I LOVE A NEW YEAR, I’ve blogged about it before, in fact I blog about it every January. I love it’s freshness, I love that we can push re-start, set new goals, new resolutions, new routines, have new plans. I love that it comes after Christmas too – a time to celebrate the year, to let people know they are loved, to shower them with gifts, to celebrate with food, movies, music, dancing, booze, and then a new year to start loving, appreciating and looking forward.
2015 had its ups and downs; it started off great, the first 6 months were amazing – I was energized by the new year, by the approaching summer and a tonne of things to look forward to…I was blogging regularly, I got to my fittest and lowest weight ever, I was becoming the person I planned for 2015, then life happened. Things out of my control, things that needed my time and attention, but weren’t part of my routine. Life hit me hard towards the second half of the year, these things came unexpected and just appeared. At one point in October I just woke up and cried, and cried and cried and cried some more – everything was spiralling out of control in what seems like all aspects of my life. So I took a few days of work, and re-set. I love my life, I love being busy, I really do – but trying to do everything in a very precise balanced way is hard, then something crumbles, then something else – and it just seems like all too much; was I just to give all of it up – or just get through it all, use my support network and focus on the important things.
So that’s what I did – I promised myself for the rest of the year I’m just going to focus on the important things, and do the things I need to keep me feeling good– and we’re at the end of the year and I feel fine, and feel like I’ve got everything back on track…which is handy, as it’s just in time for the new year.
I struggled a lot in 2015 about “loving myself” – when things got on top of me, and I couldn’t keep everything up, and things in my life were crumbling, I couldn’t help but blame myself – make myself think that I wasn’t good enough to do something, or if I was better this wouldn’t have happened etc. But I am good enough – and if I’m not good enough, I can work hard enough to be. At the start of the year I blogged about Zoe and I trying our first spinning class, I was nearly sick in that class, I genuinely thought I was going to collapse, I was so sweaty I put the towel on my car seat on my way home (it was seeping through my hoodie) and I was saddle sore for about a week after. Now I regularly spin 2 – 3 times a week, and twice a week I do a spin class, and then a weights session. After that first spin class, if you had told me that in 6 months’ time I would be friends with my spinning instructor, and girls from spinning, I would go three times a week and enjoy every single class, and I wouldn’t be saddle sore anymore; I would have laughed and thought you were crazy….but I did, I built it up and got there.
I forget about the progress, as I live in the now and for the future too much. These last few weeks I’ve been saying that 2015 has been rubbish and I can’t wait to get it over it; but looking back at the year as a whole, it’s not been that bad – I may not have the body of a Victoria Secret’s model, I may not be fit enough to run a marathon – but 2015 has shown that with baby steps I can overcome things, and learn to love the unexpected.
2016 looks like it’s going to be an exciting year, I’ve got two very good friends giving birth in 2016, so Aunty Mandy duties will be in full swing. I’ll be Bridesmaid at a wedding in Jamaica in October, a crazy weekend in Dublin and a girls holiday in Ibiza and lots more little adventures along the way. 2015 I focussed on fitness, and I’ve got to a really good place with that; and got a good routine. I’ve sworn to my body pump instructor that I will get back to my early morning workouts twice a week too (because starting off you day with a Body Pump or Kettlebells Class is actually amazing, and I have to remind myself of that when my alarm goes off at 5:30am next wednesday). 2016 I focus on food – getting healthy eating sussed, making it become the ‘norm’ and sticking to it. So expect lots of recipes, instagraming of food and generally talking about weird and wonderful new things I’m trying out.
I’m also getting back to blogging weekly – I stopped when it all got too much (this is the easiest thing to give up), but looking back at the stats when I’m blogging regularly, I’m at my healthiest – so here’s to 52 posts from my in 2016!!!